12 Ways To Fake Being A PRO Basketball Expert!!

A Doughnut ExpertAt first glance it appears difficult to be a basketball expert. There are plenty of famous pundits on TV who speak very confidently and loudly as if they come from a place of great authority. Charles Barkley, Kenny Smith, Chris Webber, Gary Payton. Just a few famous names you see on NBA broadcasts.

Don't overlook one fact... most basketball pundits are former basketball players and while they were undoubtedly better then us average joes at using their muscles to play the game, being an expert is a thinking man's game. You're undoubtedly better at using the muscle over your shoulders.

You've already met lots of their counterparts during your own life. While most of them were banging cheerleaders in high school you were developing the tools that prevented your career by the fry cooker hearing them talk about the glory days when they were 17. The difference upstairs between these guys who make it and that guy now serving you drinks is not a large stretch.

Just follow these tips and you'll be wowing people with your incredible basketball knowledge in no time. Without further adieu, one tip for each player on a b-ball team.


1. Know All The High School Players

Know everyone who jumped from high school to the pros and didn't play NCAA basketball. This one is imperative (you'll find out why in step 2) and easy because the list is relatively small. KG, Kobe, Lebron, Amare will cover nearly all conversations you intend to impress in. Knowing guys like Leon Smith (who went crazy) or Kwame Brown (who was the first #1 HS pick, and was a bust) will get you extra points but aren't necessary.

Can You Tell The Difference?
Its not difficult to know all the foreign players either. They're all the ones with funny names and stylish hair. If you hear someone with a funny name, say, Petrovich, or Galinari or if you have trouble spelling their name when you hear it, better just to avoid talking about them. This is really an important step to faking because the holy grail of faking basketball expertise is next. No funny name? Lack of great looking almost homosexual hair? Their name is something like Smith, or Williams? You're ready for step two. Jump right into the conversation and say...

2. "Man, I Remember When"

Under any and all circumstances, when a player is mentioned, speak up loudly stating "Man, that guy, I remember when he played in College. He tore it UP!" Now you know why step 1 is so important. If you don't know who went from high school to the pros you can get nailed by someone else with a "You idiot, KG didn't play in college!" Major loss of cred and double depressing because you just made someone else, who may also be faking, look really smart because he followed step 1 instead of you.

The beauty part of this line is that you don't have to know anything else. No one will 'ever' ask you for details of what you remember in college. There are so many NCAA teams its not expected for you to remember where almost anyone played. No one ever watches anything but march and its so many games at once no one ever remembers who played each other or what happened. If you do know something make sure to throw it in there for Jedi Master level respect. Anyone who knows some details about college players must be an expert, right?

"Man, Melo and Macnamera. The Orange were unstoppable that year. Over rated? I don't think so!" People will be so intimidated by the mere mention of details regarding a college event that entire rooms of people will start nodding their heads in agreement hoping that others think they know what you are talking about and they will look like YOU, an expert.

3. Pick A Player To Love

Every expert has one player they devote themselves to unconditionally. Every fake expert should have one too. Its not relevant who you pick so long as once you choose the recipient of your new man-love you refuse to budge on any interpretation of his behavior that does not fall under spectacular, amazing or divinely guided.

So long as they score lots of points they will have easy to defend stats. The axiom of basketball talent evaluation is: if you score more points per game, you 'are' the better player. This makes hyping your favorite easy. Great examples: Dwayne Wade (29.9) > Lebron James (28.6) > Kobe Bryant (27.7) > Tim Duncan (19.8). You can have a few players reach this status, however not too many because...

4. More Importantly Pick A Player To HATE.


Solid hate bait: you'll have lots of friendsOnce they've earned your hatred be sure to never waver. Your hatred of players must exceed your love or people in this game just don't take you seriously. Scoring titles, MVPs, championships or all star nods; anything this player does is craptacular. It should be noted that your list of players you hate is more effective if its larger then the list of players you love.

An expert, you see, is always very picky and judgmental about who meets their high standards. If you're critical of a player who's obviously really, really good it must mean you know something they and everyone else does not. Thus, you are a more credible and discerning expert. The logic follows: the larger list of greats you think stink simply varies directly with the list of reasons you know what your talking about. Gary Payton, one of the best defensive point guards to ever play HATES Rajon Rondo, the best defensive point guard to play today. Coincidence? I think not!

Good examples of players to pick to hate: Kobe, Gilbert Arenas, Vince Carter, Ron Artest, Stephon Marbury, Bruce Bowen. (see how my hate list is longer?)

Historical hate list all star: Karl Malone.

5. When In Doubt, Get Bullish.

There is no more powerful tool in ballshitting then Michael Jordan. Despite the fact that Jordan will land on the love OR hate list of every single basketball expert alive no expert will ever attempt to argue against an MJ comparison. Many the Kobe super-fan pundit has been roasted trying to compare the two.

Two methods of getting bullish exist. The first is to reference cliche Jordan quotes as if they were your own fantastic insights. Slip in a "Defense wins championships", "I was looking for a new challenge" or any reference to the importance of fundamentals and lesser competition shrink in the face MJ's fierce 'competitiveness'. They won't suspect for a moment it's actually your discrete laziness at work.

The second method is to bait your adversary into making a statement about a player or team that is general in any sense so you can turn it into a historical comparison to MJ and the Bulls.

Observe:

Casual Fan: "Did you see LA hand it to the Celtics and the Cavs last week? "

Expert: (to self: man, what do I do, I LOVE Lebron and the Celtics and HATE Kobe. Those games were excruciating to watch.) "Yea, I saw some of it. The highlights looked decent. How did they play? "

Casual Fan: "Man, this Lakers team is amazing!"

Expert: "You think so huh? Why's that? (<- the bait)" Casual Fan: "Yea man. Kobe is unstoppable."

Expert: "Unstoppable? He might be good but I wouldn't say unstoppable. There's no way he would ever win a 7 game series against the Bulls and MJ. People just hype him up because the competition is weak like his fundamentals."

Casual Fan: "Yea, I guess you're right.... that must be why you're the expert."

That's right. No one beats the bulls. No one is possibly better then MJ... even if he's not playing anymore. You, are an 'expert'. QED.

6. Know How To Pick A Winner

By that I don't mean picking who you think will win. Faced with two teams look no further then their records. Pick who has more W's. This is a fail safe basketball experts hold near and dear to their hearts. If your pick loses you can always fall back on the record backing up your choice and praise team B as lucky to get the win. If they win you can arrogantly state that team B never had a chance anyway.

When it comes time to open your mouth and hide the fact that you are only picking the higher number, defend your 'ideas' with step 7...

7. Develop A Few Go To Basketball Phrases

They don't say much but just sound like they do. Its so easy to slam a team using abstract phrases that skirt around any details. There's a variety of approaches so if someone in a conversation uses one of them just pick another and come on stronger till they wilt. Lets say two people are talking about the Cavs/Heat game coming up. Execute a two pronged attack.

The Setup:

Make sure to throw out a phony statement or two to act like you spent time really considering the team you're about to rip on.

"Yea, the heat have really earned a reputation as fighters this season..."

"Gotta say, the Cavs looks great on paper..."

"What people don't realize is how great the coaching for Miami is..."

"The Cavs really had some bounce in their step at the shoot around today..."

The Slam:

This is usually pretty easy. You just find some way to state that the other team's best player, ie: highest scoring player, will negate any of these good aspects you just put out there.


Is this 'man' an expert?!?!"... but they can't stop Lebron from getting into the paint."

"...but they just have no way to contain Dwayne Wade at the end of the game."

"...but they seem to really have problems defending Lebron in the pick and roll."

"...but you have to wonder about the schedule they've been on, there's been no Wade calibre players."

Just remember, what you lack in specifics you make up for with authority. So the louder you speak and the more you flail around (like this expert on the right, seriously!!) the more people will think you're actually getting excited about something real instead of just making shit up.

7. Learn To Hate The NBA And It's Officials

This is a critical step on the journey of any basketball expert: real or fictional. At any juncture your credibility as an expert can be expounded on by mentioning how the NBA is fixed by David Stern and/or it's refs. Seeing as how one of their boys in black and white was indited for working with the mob to fix games its not a difficult case to make.


Note 'Fredo Style' facial expression Some cliches that will assist you in the task are as follows:

"The only reason the Lakers won their titles was the Refs. The Kings and/or Blazers were robbed!"

"How could Phoenix win when they suspended Amare? The Suns were robbed!"

"David Stern? Everyone knows he fixed the draft lottery when the Knicks got Ewing. The entire league was ROBBED!">

Learn these and a few more shady situations with the refs. One of them even challenged Tim Duncan to a fight in the parking lot once and the NBA assigned him to ref a Spurs playoff game a year after. Fish in a barrel, see what I mean? You'll have people looking to you for advice on their fantasy teams in no time.

8. Learn A Few Famous Moments To Reminisce With Hardcore Fans

This is a gimme. If you can loosely quote the commentator or reference a few watershed moments around fans or a particular player or team, you're 'in' like spandex during the 80's. The key here is to wait for someone else to bring up the topic so you can look knowledgeable when you complete their thoughts with the correct emotive response. They'll be so taken with the mention of their personal experience they won't even notice you don't know jack squat about hoop. Upon any mention of:

Chris Webber: say enthusiastically "Time out time out!". Michigan/Webber fans will be crushed into submission that you know their dark secret and say nothing or change the topic as quickly as possible.

Allen Iverson: say sarcastically with a drawl "Practice!?!?"

Lakers: say fondly "Man, Magic's baby hook baby"

Celtics: say joyfully "Havlicek stole the ball!" (extra points if you say Henderson with a wink)

Bulls: say as if you had a mouth full of marbles "A spectacular move by Jordan"

Ders Crazy In Dem Dere Eyes!
Lattrel Spreewell: say sardonically "Hey, my family's gotta eat. I can't choke them!"

Karl Malone: say like your IQ is in the 80's "I'm the MVP!"

Ron Artest: punch the person in the face and say "Sorry, thought you threw a beer at me." Use 'crazy eyes' for extra points.

Clippers: say dejectedly "Uh, why am I a Clippers fan anyway?"

9. Overstate Championship Experience

It just doesn't matter that 5 of the last 10 NBA champions never made the finals before. It also doesn't matter that 11 of the last 20 NBA finalists never made the finals before. And that does not even include Kobe's new team last year that was totally different sans Shaq or Spurs sans Robinson. What does matter is championship experience!


What Experience Did For Magic In The Finals...
The rule follows as such: if two teams are being compared always say the one who made the finals or won them are better because of their 'experience'. The fact they made the finals is not only an indicator they are among the most talented teams and are winning because of that. No sir! Its the 'magical' experience.

You'll hear plenty of pundits overstate how the Spurs have the experience advantage this year which makes it a great statement to hide your lack of knowledge behind cuz everyone else is saying it too.

When a younger team takes down the experienced team express shock and awe that they didn't win the game/series. When the Spurs knocked the champion Shaq/Kobe Lakers out of the playoffs in the second round, Bill Walton's confidence in LA's experience induced him to call it "The Greatest Win In Spurs History!" even though 4 years earlier they won the title. The disbelief in his voice... genuine shock.

You may want to break out the 'passing the torch' cliche for this event. It couples greatly with always giving the edge to the team with the better record. When you pick the team that won before AND has the best record no one will dare challenge your ability to repeat obvious statements you heard on TV or read on-line.

10. Dumpster Dive For Bench Players

Anyone can be a basketball expert. As I'm saying, anyone can fake it. But only 'real' experts have the innate ability to tell who the 'good yet still crappy' players are. Right? Wrong! There are a few approaches to selecting who will be the recipient of your gracious praise for playing limited minutes in garbage time.

• The safe approach: Pick an aging veteran who has a rich history but can't play to save his life due to 4 knee reconstructions and 32 STDs. This is the easy out as you can wax poetic about the player they used to be and even still get excited when they get inserted into a playoff game and knock down a wide open shot or two to win a game. Guys like Jerry Stackhouse, Robert Horry and Michael Finley are great examples of players pundits have ridden to historic careers of blabbing bullshit.

• The Fan Favorite: This guy is a truly crappy player whom a stadium's fans will cheer hysterically for any time they actually manage to score a point or make a play that doesn't result in a turnover. They'll even get ovations merely for being checked into a game. Brian Scalenbrine, Mark Madsen and Matt Bullard are all players fans have connected with because after watching them play live they realize that someone on the floor actually has comparable basketball skills to themselves and form a special connection. Its a beautiful thing.
  

• The Energy/Defense Guy: You can spot this player when the team is down 20 in the fourth diving into old/pregnant women's bosoms for loose balls. Everyone knows he's got very little talent. But he knows that almost all NBA players are mailing in an 82 game season before anything they care about is on the line. So he can have a role in the league working his butt off to frustrate the Vince Carters of the world. Sometimes an energy guy gets credit for being a 'defensive ace'. Bruce Bowen's PR guy has managed to pull off transforming drop kicking players into DPOY nominations. Sometimes he just turns out to be a Pape Sow/Amundson. For sentimental reasons he's a great choice cuz at least he tries.

11. Learn The Brutal NBA PR Slogans

'Every' NBA expert loves to sarcastically quote the NBA PR campaigns and so should you! Should always be delivered with a sense of irony, a tongue in the cheek and a wink in the eye roll. They are:

Don't Worry Little Fella: The NBA Cares about someone (psst:he's on your sign)

The NBA Cares (about money)

I love this game!

There Can Only Be One!

Where AMAZING happens!

The NBA... Its FANNNNNNNNtastic!

And with that bit of Shakespearian genius... its time for the last tip...

12. Oh! Those PUNdits!

"NEVER" Pass Up An Opportunity To Make A Bad Pun. NEVER! I truly believe they let these ex-player/jocks write their own headlines. Check out ESPN and you'll see them every day of the week. How clever and original they must feel. "Mavs Cool Down Heat", "Suns Scortch Knicks", "Mountaineers have tough climb", "Jets fly by Giants", "Wolves Bite Pistons". Oh... the wit! It makes my brain bleed.

And there you have it. 12 sure fire ways to fool everyone around you into thinking you have a clue about the pro game. They will not steer you wrong. Remember, you're probably smarter then the people on TV and those that listen to them in the first place. Good luck screwing up as many playoff bets and college brackets as possible. Even if you are guessing there's a pretty good chance you'll be doing the exact same thing as they are, so no harm done!

Why The Pistons Have Been Robbed

An interesting thing has happened recently that has changed the legacy of the game. Towards the end of the 90's the talent in the NBA was getting old and defenses were getting tougher. Ramping up the defense has always been a way for less athletic teams to win. This culminated in 2003 when the Detroit Pistons nearly swept the Lakers in the finals and affirmed themselves as an elite team if not the greatest defensive team in history.

Now since that time, they've made the finals once (not deserving, due to a Wade shoulder injury, I'll add) and the east finals every single year. Hard to say they've not done well. Right? Wrong. The Pistons have been tagged as a lazy team, or an over confident/arrogant team. But realistically, they should have multiple more rings and be vaunted as the best team since MJ's Bulls as well as one of the best of all time.

Why you ask? The league responded to the Pistons winning the championship with rules that directly reduced the effectiveness of their style of play. They also emphasized the enforcement of previous rules meant to weaken defenses to stop teams like Detroit from having success. This has also resulted in the improvement of perimeter players like Tony Parker, Kobe, Bron to appear to be that much better players then their elders. Check it out.

Heres a site with all the rule changes the nba made over the years. Take a look at the last few years (post Jordan years you'll note).

http://www.nba.com/analysis/rules_history.html

They've been making it much, much easier for guards to score which has really hyped how 'good' a lot of today's guards are. Tony Parker (and I hate to include Nash) really benefited from these... a lot. The rules were changed over years and not all at once so even hard core ball fans didn't really take notice.

Here are a few highlights.

2001-02
• Illegal defense guidelines will be eliminated in their entirety.

• A new defensive three-second rule will prohibit a defensive player from remaining in the lane for more than three consecutive seconds without closely guarding an offensive player.

• During 20-second timeouts in the last two minutes of the fourth period and/or any overtime period there are unlimited substitutions.
Previously the team calling the timeout could substitute one player. The other team could substitute only if the team calling timeout substituted.

• If a player is fouled when he has a clear-path-to-the-basket, he gets one free throw and his team gets possession of the ball at midcourt.
Previously, the player received two free throws.

• On the weakside, defenders must remain on the weakside outside the paint unless (i) they are double-teaming the ball, (ii) picking up a free cutter or (iii) closely guarding an offensive player.

It sounds counter-intuitive to say zones increase scoring, but quick guards who can shoot cut a zone to pieces, even more so when your big has to leave the paint which defeats the entire purpose of the zone: as a player gets closer to the hole the defense always gets bigger and stronger. Not as you get closer the biggest defender has to move in and out of position. Help defenders on the weak side are no longer even allowed in the painted area greatly reducing their ability to grab rebounds and clog the lane.

By adding unlimited substitutions it also allows coaches to sub in players and run a quicker team who won't tire out the same way they run shifts in hockey, but only in the last two minutes. This means that for 98% of the game you can't sub in and out so your players have to pace themselves. In the last two minutes you can run your quick small guards like crazy, get them out and rotate them as much as you want creating the illusion of players overcoming defenses at the end of the game.

By adding a clear path rule you could no longer foul when a player beats you in the open court to prevent an automatic two points as they will keep possession. You saw this move constantly in the 90's and its got to account for a few points change in differential each game. All this made it much harder to win with defense.

Against these changes they still won the title with hard nosed defense. In a direct response the NBA rules committee made it even easier to score, harder to defend and thus harder for the Pistons to win. The next season, the NBA made these small changes on paper.

2004-05
• New rules were introduced to curtail hand-checking, clarify blocking fouls and call defensive three seconds to open up the game.

In practice they however they changed reality instructing the refs to start calling these things MUCH more frequently. The result: a dramatic explosion in scoring, smaller guards becoming incredibly effective and an increasingly difficult league to defend.

They sat a couple years on that and then helped small quick guards like Tony Parker by making defensive 3 second calls even easier to whistle... this was the first year Nash's style started to dominate the NBA... You'll also remember that this is 'precisely' when guards like Arenas/Wade/Nash/Barbosa started scoring points like crazy. This opened that strong side high screen to the weak side curl that Lebron does all the time and was so evident when he had his historic playoff game with the Pistons. A few years previous and Bron would not have such clear lanes to the hoop. He could still do it, but its a lot easier when Ben Wallace is out of position when he was starting his drive.

Super dominant bigs like Duncan/Shaq/Wallace also started looking less effective. It makes sense too: on the defensive end guards were killing them. Rail thin agile bigs like Amare/Marion/Josh Smith started to look like they were just better since they could move back into position more quickly. Camby's numbers went way up at the end of his career and seemed so much more effective then in his prime to the point where he won DPOY. For the first time, ever (I believe), a guard (Tony Parker) led the league in points in the paint.

By 2006 the Pistons had clearly lost a series to Lebron specifically due to the rule changes and appeared very weak. They didn't even deserve to make the finals. An injury to another quick perimeter guard, Dwayne Wade, gave them the series vs Miami. Karma's a bitch though: nope, not who you think in SA. TD was quite quiet. The Pistons were able to push it to 7 games but it was two perimeter players under new rules who dominated them, Manu Ginobli and Tony Parker. Not to be out done the NBA could not stand the Pistons/Spurs finals matchup of the two best defensive teams and brought in more rules.

2006-07
• Free substitution is permitted during all 20-second timeouts.
• On a clear-path-to-the-basket foul, the team that is fouled is awarded two free throw attempt and the ball on the sideline.

The substitution rule makes basketball more like hockey so super quick guards could jump on the court, run it out, then jump off got updated to cover entire games. You could see Barbosa and phoenix benefited a lot from this. Dantoni knew if they ran up the score the opponents would call time. Then he could and used everyone on his bench to switch up his players constantly. Kudos to him for realizing the advantages the new rules produced. They also updated the clear path rule to punish defenses for grabbing a player on the break even more.

They missed a rule change on that page too. After they changed all the perimeter hand check/blocking fouls players were complaining about getting whistled for ticky tack foul that had never been called in the history of the league. Basketball is a contact sport but on the pro level this has changed. It was blowing the NBA's campaign (and hurt their image) that the talent level was going through the roof cuz the players were always pissed off.

Being most image conscious and paranoid organization I can thing of, the NBA brought in a 0-tolerance policy that would t up a player for 'any' complaints about calls, and suspend them a game for every T they got past 14, even in playoff games. This was not intentional, but within the theme, it affected Rasheed Wallace and the Pistons more then any other team.

I do think the new rules improved the game. A high scoring seven seconds or less style is much me exciting to watch then the aforementioned Pistons/Spurs series. What is problematic though is a tarnished legacy of pro basketball. If MJ played today he would dominate these defenses unlike any player today but ignorant Kobe fans claim 81 points means Kobe is the best in history. Likewise fantastic and great defensive teams like the 01-09 Pistons will never be able to be compared to their late 80's counterparts because the game has changed without people noticing so this version of the Pistons gets slagged.

The irony: it was a direct reaction to Detroit winning a title in the 04 finals that scared the NBA into the new rules. Changing the rules to account for your success is the greatest compliment that can be served. It means you are the best. So good its unfair to others. Wilt had many rules changed for him in the same way. But its A little back handed. After having the rules changed the Piston's have been punked by various writers, fans and players.

The reality? Tough defense on the perimeter (Billups/Rip/Tay) with great enforcers at the rim (Wallaces) were about to dominate the post Jordan era as the best defensive team of all time. Realistically they might have won 3 or 4 more straight when you consider it may have been Vets like KG signing with the proven winner instead of Boston. But the NBA is not very good at marketing defense. They wanted the next Jordan. Since new Jordan wasn't coming they changed the rules to try and create one. The Pistons changed their style and still made the finals but their team was built to play by different rules and fell short.

What should be? This Pistons team should been a dynasty. A hall of fame team credited with one championship and a label of arrogant underachievers. Its a great what if but seems that had the NBA not plotted directly against defense and indirectly against Detroit they'd have at least 2-3 championships and 2-3 more finals appearances cementing them as 'the' post Jordan team and team of the new millennium.

Conversely, the Spurs and Duncan, who are that team, would probably have lost vs the Pistons in 05 and faced the Pistons in 07 for a much tougher finals matchup (they killed the Eric Snow Cavs). If they lose that series, its Duncan and the Spurs who are underachievers and teams will say "they feel they can just turn it on and off." The Pistons will have 3-4 championships in 5 years and the Spurs won't have won since David Robinson was there which would lead people to say Timmy could never win without him.

Its is a what-if. Maybe it does not go that way. But its quite evident that the rules didn't lower the ceiling of this team but took them down from potential they had already fully realized. The rule changes redistributed the wealth of credibility in the NBA and that should be duly noted. Look at the 10 game stretch on the right. They held 5 straight teams under 70 points and 10 straight under 85. Defensively you don't get higher. They went on to destroy the Laker marketing machine of 4 HOF players on one team and as I've stated the NBA knew something had to be done. It can't market scorers and super star players when a real team playing together can this effectively shut them down.

Hey, I'm honest, I'll take Bron and Wade instead. Entertaining as hell and I watch to be entertained. I just think it should be noted that the greatness of nearly every star today owe a huge chunk of their games and notoriety to Wallace, Wallace, Billups, Hamilton, Prince and Larry Brown. One of the greatest teams to ever play basketball.

MVP: Simplicity Gone Stupid: All We Are Saying Is Give Wade A Chance!

Its pretty self-explanatory, is it not? The MVP award goes to the player who's 'most valuable' to their team. Every year you will read plenty of would be experts state that the award should go to the 'best player on the best team' or some other golden rule that ignores the obvious. Player X is the most effectively being promoted by the NBA in that given year and their rule favors player x. Typically the guy who's leading the league in scoring or is from a successful Boston/LA/NYC team.

But that’s not what the award is for. They already have an award for the best player on the best team. Its called the NBA championship and finals MVP. A much better award as it's earned instead of anointed, but I digress. What’s happened in recent years has just obscured any meaning behind the most important individual regular season award.

Don't get me wrong: team success is important. But lets look what's happening. Since the all star break Wade is averaging a ridiculous 35.3 PPG, 10.7 APG, 2.7 steals, 1.8 blocks per game. Lets compare his numbers against Kobe and Lebron. I don't know about you, but when you are listed as third in the MVP race, against two players considered to be the best in the world yet are averaging more steals and almost identicle assists/blocks then the two candidates ahead of you, COMBINED, and oh yea, scoring 5 and a half more points then either, something is wrong.

	REB	AST	STL	BLK	PTS
Wade	5.73	10.82	2.82	1.36	36.45
Lebron	7.00	6.82	1.00	0.82	26.09
Kobe	4.73	4.45	1.09	0.73	29.36
Kobron Brames		11.27	2.09	1.55

Still, general consensus is that Kobe and Lebron are in a two man heat. Forget that no one since Jordan has played at this level. A few include Wade if the Heat get 50 wins. Which has everything to do with starting a rookie at point and a way past his prime center and nothing to do with Wade being the most important and valuable player on any team that matters (or doesn't) in the NBA.

From a historical standpoint I have not seen a single player take a bottom feeder team and make them win like this since Grant Hill's Pistons won 54 games. Except he had gamers like Dumars and Lindsay Hunter, Otis Thorpe and Theo Ratlif (before he was a contract). In the locker room vets like Ric Mahorn, and Kenny Smith in the locker room. Hill should have won MVP that year yet similar to Wade was behind Jordan and Karl "I'm the MVP" Malone. (the single worst choice ever).

Maurice Brooks of ESPN wrote recently:

" But as the Cavaliers' 107-100 win over the Heat showed Monday, no matter how brilliantly he performs, he can't elevate Miami to the level needed for him to pass Bryant and James in the MVP pecking order.

Imagine getting in a fight and just as you are starting to get the upper hand on your opponent, all of his/her friends jump in. Your friends are there, too, but instead of helping you, they go MIA (no pun intended)."

But where’s the logic? Extending the analogy the fight outside a bar is a measure of the fighter's toughness and the MVP should be given to the toughest person involved. Miami's players around Wade don't know how to fight he has to fight on his own.

Now, if he just gets his butt whipped that’s a sorry excuse no matter what, but if he manages to take most of the gang down on his own but still loses when someone holds his arms back while Kobe punches him in the gut, does he not get extra consideration? He just took down half the Lakers gang by himself!

Not to mention that the non-tough person, the coward as you will, is the guy who only fights with a gang of tough friends around him. Its just plain old non-thinking. So many base their reasoning for a purely individual award on an blatant team statistic. The two go together and you have to attribute how much that players elevates his team.

Ask yourself: what would Miami's record be if Wade was not there? Answer: the basement. Last year with a mostly hobbled Wade they won 15 games. This year: seeded fourth in the playoff race with home court advantage in the first round. Where would Kobe's team be if he hurt his own knee instead of Bynum's? I'd say they lose a few more games but still be right in it for a very high seed and one of the best records.

For LBJ, its a little different. Without him his team would not be in the Clipper zone. Competitive, but with an over-achieving ceiling of probably .500 ball and no where near the laughing stock Miami would be without wade. He makes a 20-30 game difference all on his own and people respond to that by demanding more. The Heat are on pace for 45-50 wins. I'm wondering how 0-5 wins can honestly sway someone when watching a season like Wade is putting up.

An MVP's presence as one player should make the team overachieve as a whole. Otherwise, you're just a replaceable piece in a well constructed puzzle. Kobe replaceable? Not so crazy. A number of good 2's that could fit in with LA's system/players and achieve team success. If he's just part of a great team, they have to do something crazy specially dominant as a team (win 70 games maybe) to show that he's elevating them beyond to another level. I ask myself how people can really root for that guy outside the bar administering the gut punch. Its like rooting for Cobra Kai instead of Daniel San.

As it stands 2 thirds through this NBA season only two players, LBJ and Wade (arguably Duncan, factoring in injuries) have really pushed their teams over the top of what they should have done. That should be the entire MVP race. Unfortunately, a lot of people who are really voting for the MSCH (most sports center highlights) award.

MVP should be based on one thing: how does a player affect his team? Last year's deserving MVP was Chris Paul and that season, arguably the best PG season in history, will be forgotten with no accolades. Now its Wade's turn to be forgotten. One of the best individual seasons in recent memory is going to be remembered for a first or second round playoff exit and nothing more. The MVP is turning into the Oscar for best player. The real best players get left behind in the books. Its a NBA shame.

This Week In Fantasy Movement...

Jarret Jack - Jack is having a huge boost in production as he is using Danny Granger's minutes in a campaign to make sure people take notice. Jack's production has been through the roof averaging almost 25 points, 2 steals, 6 assists and 2-3 boards.

 

Thabo Sefolasha - A must start if you need his increased production. With Durant and now Jeff Green out of the lineup expect big things from the Thunder newcomer. Don't be put off by low season numbers. Thabo spent the season up to the trade deadline on the Bulls bench. You can expect much bigger things more like his last game when his coach played him 41 minutes and produce he did for 28 points and 8 assists.

 

Richard Hamilton - While starting or coming off the bench won't change a lot minute wise for Rip (he gets his minutes) his demeanor has changed completely as has the play of the Pistons around him. With the team and Rip back to their regular chemistry (and Iverson out with a mysterious bench, err, back injury) Hamilton has been using his all around game (and great percentages) to help many an owner. Pick him up if you need him.

 

Leandro Barbosa - While Jason Richardson is making flashy dunks don't forget about this Suns faithful who's taking over Nash's position at the 1 while he's out. Nash's injury looks to be hanging around and while he's gong Barbosa is a fantasy steal. 41 points, 7 boards, 7 dimes, 6 steals 16/27 field, 5/7 3's, 100% from the line is massive, massive night in ANY fantasy league. Barbosa might be worth hanging onto when Nash comes back as well as this has to do with the Nash injury but more to do with the Suns finally dropping Terry Porter and returning to PHX Suns fastketball.